Posted: May 2, 2014 in Uncategorized
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I know. I know. I know. It’s a little presumptuous of me to assume that this blog will ever reach Craig Ferguson, but I have to try. So here goes:

Dear Craig, 

Now that you’re no longer in the late late arena, I have an idea for you – a television show for people who like daylight. The name of the sitcom is, These Are Your Lives.

Here is the premise: These Are Your Lives is a paranormal game show that examines past lives. Just by tuning in or by calling in to guess what happened to contestants in one of their previous lives, viewers become unwitting contestants in a future show.

Viewers conjecture why a contestant is experiencing problems in this life based only on the minimal information they receive about the contestant from the host. Craig, I want YOU to be one of the writers of this show AND I want you to be the host!

An example of what a contestant might hear from a viewer: “Your son-in-law was your husband in a previous life and you abused him.” – “The reason you are in a wheelchair in this life is because you walked all over somebody in your previous life.” – “You can’t see well in this life, because you refused to see the truth in your past life.” 

You could make up all kinds of “reasons” for somebody being in a certain situation, and you could be as irreverent as you want to be. What the contestants don’t know is that every time they call in, every time they tune in, they become – without their knowledge (at first) – contestants in future shows. After a while the viewing public knows they will become contestants and panic if somebody in their family “accidentally” tunes in to the show. Too late – they have already become future contestants. People are terrified of watching, but also so curious about the show, they feel they have to watch. And the show ALWAYS KNOWS who is watching!

How contestants “win” and what they “win” is up to the host, but I’m thinking that the prize could be something winner-specific, like a dream house, a dream vacation, or even a million dollars to make it worth watching in the first place – or – it could be a dream house in a future life, a dream vacation through astral projection, or a million dollars in their dreams. The “way” contestants win is based on the number of viewers who correctly guess within the time-frame of the show why they are who they are in this life, arbitrarily agreed upon by the host.

Who determines the “correct” answer? The host, of course, who has an eery way of knowing “how” he knows who the contestants were in a previous life. 

So, Craig Ferguson, what do you think? Are you up for the challenge (presuming you’re even interested in the topic, of course)?

Want more of me? Visit Wiza on Wix.

(photo of Craig Ferguson from Wikimedia Commons was taken on my birthday last year)

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